Andrew's belongings

Last night I went downstairs, opened our storage closet and walked in. While this may seem pretty mundane and ordinary having no possible relevance to anyone. It is relevant to me. For the first time since November, I made my way to the back corner of the closet and opened the plastic bin holding all of Andrew's personal affects.

There are most of the outfits he wore in his life. Newborn to 6 - 9 months. Blankets. The few toys and stuffed animals he received. And items from the funeral.

I knelt down and touched a few of the outfits he had worn a year ago. Immediately memories came to me of him in each outfit I saw. I rubbed them gently. And put the lid back on, rose up and got out of there as quickly as I could. Gosh will I ever be able to look and touch his things without such a strong reaction.

We have some keep sakes the funeral home has made available for us that friends are holding. I am reluctant to bring home the flower they preserved from the spray on his casket. The Art Studio that is making the marker has some of his things as well. How do I do that too? And a tree was planted in his memory at the Botanical Garden. There is supposed to be a plaque with his name on it. I'm not sure when to go see it.

I'm not sure how to handle his belongings.

So I won't decide today.