My New Niece

I held my new niece yesterday.

She had a little pink headband with a tiny pink bow on it around her little head. And she has pudgy little cheeks. She's a little chunk of a girl and her mommie thinks she is just so precious. And of course she should. It's her first child.

Mommie is my brother-in-law's girlfriend, thus how she is my niece. Technically half niece but who cares about that.

When I heard they were having her, I remember being glad and then being scared of seeing her.

Andrew would have been 11 months next week. A great age span for the two to play together. But now that won't happen.

I also remember thinking about how Mark and I should go visit her and congratulate them, etc. See their newborn. But quickly was hesitant.

I couldn't help but think, how am I going to react to holding a newborn baby born on the same floor where Andrew was born. The OR is off of the wing she is in. And the gynecologist is my gynecologist. She was trying to find a good one and I just love mine. He's awesome! He delivered both Andrew and Ryan. One naturally and the other by Cesarean. So I've gotten to see his work in two different settings.

Well Dr. Houghton wasn't on duty and he didn't deliver my niece. A doctor that I only met briefly when I was in the hospital on bed rest with Andrew did the honors with her. But she did have a C-section too. So, of course, we traded war stories.

So yeah, I went up to see her. I decided to give it a try and if it was too much I just excuse myself and leave. She was quite surprised but glad I came.

The new one nestled up and fell asleep in my arms. It seems she's kind of fidgety and her mom was amazed that she slept calmly in my arms. I had the magic touch she said.

She was amazing. And, of course, I remembered Andrew. But, to my surprise, I handled it okay. I stayed for twenty minutes holding her. Invited her to come stop on by at Uncle Mark and I's house for mommy and daddy to have a break but not overnight.

I'm glad their daughter is doing well. They should have come home together today. The way it should be. The way I wanted it to be with Andrew and was delayed by 3 weeks that joy. I'm so glad for them.

I hope no one ever has to go through what we went through in losing Andrew. It's just too hard at times.............................. too hard I tell you......................... too hard.

This picture is of Andrew at 8 days old in my arms.