The Outfit

One of the tough moments, of many, came within an hour of meeting at the funeral home and making arrangements.

The funeral director left the room for us to look through books on flowers and caskets. Consider these odd things that we had to deal with. When she returned to the room, I recall feeling a slight bit composed. Jaime, the director, told us that she just heard that they had just received his remains.

That stopped the room. Nothing moved. Everyone looked at us watchful of what we would do. And the oddest feeling. A sudden pit in the depth of our hearts. A sinking feeling. A sharp pain of loneliness.It caught in my throat.I reached out for Mark's arm.My eyes looked down as my face fell.

"Really?" Was our reaction. "He's here."
"Yes."

It was such an odd feeling knowing that he was now at the main funeral home loctaion.

They were verifying his measurements and confirmed the size of casket that would be needed for him. And soon learned that the Mickey Mouse outfit was too small. We would have to find him something else. But there was nothing else at home.

We went out on the oddest shopping trip. Something cute. Something him.

We walked through a few different stores. There were some cute outfits but none of them were right.

But Mark picked out a red polo T-shirt and blue jean shorts. I didn't like it but we felt ill as we looked through the baby clothes at the stores. I was so exhausted and mentally drained. I didn't think I would ever find the right outfit. And didn't want to drag this out any more than it had.

But he couldn't be naked.