The Good-Bye

I remember how when I was in the ER standing over him, touching his little shoulder, calling to him and telling how much I love him. The doctors and nurses were feverishly working on him and I was shocked to be witnessing my son in such a state.And then Jesus came into the room. That sure made me take notice. I immediately wondered if He was going to take my son away. And I wasn’t ready. I almost fell over thinking that it was going to be all over and I wasn’t ready and it wasn’t his time. I knew that with all my heart. IT WAS NOT HIS TIME. It was too soon. He had more life to live.

Thankfully the Lord told me that it wasn’t Andrew’s time but that he had a choice to stay or go home. I immediately thought that it was going to be okay because Andrew wouldn’t choose to go home with Jesus. We loved him and adored him and I cherished him. He wouldn’t have a reason not to stay. Silly me.

On Friday afternoon, the day before he died, I was holding his precious hand in mine, leaning onto his bed, kissing him, loving on him, I was telling him it was time for him to wake up and come back to me. And it was like I was transported to another place.

I saw Andrew sitting on Jesus’ lap watching the sun set. Andrew had this huge smile on his face as he looked up at the Lord. The Lord was looking down at him with a smile and they were talking. Immediately I called out to him.

“Andrew. Sweetie.”

Andrew turned around just beaming with his beautiful, huge smile that always made his face light up and eyes sparkle. I saw the recognition in his eyes that he always gave to me. He was always glad to see me. He was as fond of me as I was of him. Well, almost.

“Come on sweetie.” I said to him with happiness.

And I remember clearly. He looked up at the Lord, Jesus smiled at him and Andrew looked to the sunset again.

At the time I was confused. The vision ended and I remember looking at his frail body lying there in “coma” wondering what had just happened.

And the day after he died I understood. He was saying good-bye to me and letting me know that he was safe and happy.

Such a precious little boy. That’s my boy. That’s my Andrew.

I still love you little special and miss you so much!