A Snapshot of Mommy with Andrew

One morning in March or April of this year, Andrew woke up around 4:30 a.m. He was around 3 - 4 months old by this time and had started to sleep for 5 hour stretches in a row. It was glorious! But this particular night had been a night where both Mark and I did not get the best of sleep. So much so, in fact, that Mark had fallen into such a deep sleep that he didn't hear the little special cry out with a tone that said he was very upset about something.

I staggered out of bed and stumbled down the hallway. You would have thought I was drunk but really I was just that tired and out of it. But I did have enough sense to know that my little guy was probably hungry. So I warmed up his bottle and clumsily drug myself back down the hallway into the bedroom.

Upon plugging the bottle into my son's crying mouth, I learn, with dismay, that for some reason, the bottle isn't going to do it rihgt now. So it's time for Plan B. Change the diaper.

I gently pick him up and change his diaper whispering to him that it's all okay. That mommy is here and that I love him. His crying seems to subside and I feel relieved that after the feeding, all will be right with the world and I will be able to resume my regularly scheduling programming of sleep.

However, even with a clean diaper and bottle plugged in yet again, he doesn't seem to be all that happy. Concerned he will wake my husband or the other kids, and knowing that something is up with my little guy, I stand up and decide that perhaps he and I should chat.

"Oh sweetie," I whisper at him, "It's nigh-night time not wakey time. You need to go back to sleep."

He stops crying and gives me a look like I am the most wonderful thing on the planet. Then he pulls out his famous grin like he's so glad I'm holding him and that all is right with the world. Well, my heart melts being totally disarmed by this little charmer. And despite my exhaustion and desire for sleep, I kiss him on his forehead and begin heading over to my bed.

"You need mommy don't you."

He grins his usual, delighted, full grin at me and his eyes sparkle like he just won the lottery.

"Alright. Let's have some snuggle time."

So I drew him really close to me, laid down in bed on my side every so carefully so that I didn't harm him or scare him, and gently laid him down a foot from my chest. Then I laid all the way down and placed my forehead to his. (The usual snuggle position for us.) I put my right finger into the palm of his left hand and immediately he grasped on as I began to run my thumb over his precious fingers. We looked into each other's eyes and I began whispering sweetly to him of my love and affection for him and how special he was. Soon I felt his body relax and he smiled with a look of total enamoration as I begin to plant little kisses on his forehead between sentences. And he just ate it up.

After 5 - 10 minutes or so, we were both so warm and snuggly together, that we both just drifted off into a sound sleep for a few hours. Content and happy to be close to each other. And my heart warmed knowing he just wanted mommy.